How many children is normal?
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Posted
by Melanie at
8/5/2009 6:36 AM PDT
on 1st Birthday Ideas
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As I may have mentioned at some point, we have three daughters in our family. Being that we have three of the same gender, we are frequently asked if we'll "try for a boy," as if we have any control over which sex we conceive. We did not set out to begin our own sorority and yes, we fear the teenage years and the current small size of our bathrooms.
There are some perks to having all girls, or all of the same gender, I suppose. First off, it's much easier to call, "GIRLS!" when you're serving dinner. It's great for wardrobe simplicity, at least while they're young and of different sizes. Toys can be shared across the board. And if the desire to switch rooms, bedding, or lunch boxes arises, it's an easy transition.
But what about that elusive boy child? Are we missing out? I have often wondered what a boy would be like in this family. Would he be inherently different from my girls because of his gender, or do we tend to raise a certain type of child by our parenting traits? Would a boy, born fourth after three sisters, be more or less rough-and-tumble than your average boy? Would he be more, ahem, effeminate?
Which brings me to my next point, and that's how many children does the average family have, and at what point does it begin to look more like a herd (a term I heard this weekend in reference to a large family) and less like a typical American brood?
According to Wikipedia, source for all things factual, the average household had less than two children by the 2000 census. I'd hate to see all those half children roaming around the 'hood - scary! So if the typical American family has two kids, what does a family of four look like to the general public? I have encountered many more large families lately, and by large I mean four kids on average. And while it may seem like a lot when they travel in a line down the sidewalk, it also seems loving and cozy and fun (from the outside). I haven't seen any more of these larger families exhibit frustration and exasperation than those with a smaller group. Of course, these are my own highly unscientific observations, but those are the ones that count when I'm considering adding to our family.
When I think about how I feel when we babysit friends' kids, or have play dates and birthday parties, the truth is I enjoy the chaos. The more kids laughing and playing and eating the better - to a point. These kids always go home, and we return to our "normal." Would having a larger family all the time be right for us?
I can't say for sure that we'll have another baby. The thought of a full, busy household is appealing to me, and yet we're moving steadily toward a group of self-sufficient, easy going girls; it's hard to imagine taking a step back. As our school lives and careers progress, the time to decide is approaching fast. Will we stay a family of five, or take the plunge?
And will we get a boy the next time?
